B.A.B.E. Week 38: Period of tremendous hope

This past week has been hectic (even more than usual) -- thus the blog is 2 days late, but thankfully Elle continues to talk and enjoy being around our family (from Italy and Missouri).   It made it easier to be gone knowing that Elle was surrounded by 8 people (Wilson, Wilson's cousin --Jen, Jen's husband, Jen's daughters ages 16 and 20, Elle's greataunt and great-uncle, and her beloved nanny.)   And Elle laughed and played and enjoyed all of their love and attention.

B.A.B.E. Week 37: Recovering from a red-eye and co-sleeping

This past week has seen further development in Elle's socializing and physical skills.   She can now stand while grasping onto a chair or something else sturdy.  We have to stay right there to spot her when she loses balance but it is fun to see the delight she has in standing supported by an inanimate object.  She is also making different sounds -- sounds that seem like words such as "Mum" and "Hi!".  Not sure if these are actually her first vocal words yet, but it is fun to think that she is starting to communicate with us.  The range of sounds emanating from her delightful mouth seem to grow materially each of the last several weeks.

 Luckily her happy communication often drowns out her distressed communication.  This was especially helpful as we were all pretty miserable taking a red eye from Utah to the Bahamas via a 3 hour stop in Miami.   Our flight left Utah at 1:30 am and arrived in Florida around 8 am local time (5 am Utah time), and 3 hours later we hopped over to Nassau.   Elle slept some pre-departure, on the plane (with short bouts of crying at the uncomfortableness of it), in the airport in Florida, and on the flight from Florida to the Bahamas.   But the sleep was very interrupted, so when we arrived home yesterday, there was a lot of sleeping to be done.

Yesterday, Elle had a 2.5 hour nap until 5 pm.   Then went to bed again at 6:15 pm.   Then she woke up again around 9 pm, was up for about an hour, and then slept in our bed.   From 10 pm - 7am, I know she woke up a couple of times but it was all a blur to me because I was so tired from the red-eye.   Talking about being tired and co-sleeping is scary.   Scary primarily because I don't want to risk Elle's safety by being over tired.  That said, I felt that the risk is very low or else I wouldn't have her sleep in the bed with us.

The reason that I think the risk to Elle is very low is because human beings have been co-sleeping with their children for millennia.   I also think that she is a big girl at 8 and 1/2 months and can roll and push up easily.  I also try to "childproof" the bed by having a very firm mattress, a light blanket, and pushing the bed against the wall with pillows pushed into the crack to prevent Elle from rolling off or getting caught in the crack.   

Am I overjoyed that Elle occasionally sleeps in the night in the bed with us?  No.   But would I rather have her sleep in the bed with us then fight an overtired battle for the both of us?  Yes.   Have we been working on ending the co-sleeping ever since it started (around four months)?  Yes.    Will we succeed with Elle in a portacrib at the foot of our bed?  Who knows?  Will we succeed for the rest of her toddler/childhood years?  Who knows?  I know many people who have struggled with kids wanting to sleep in their beds for years.  And I know people who have refused to have their kids in their beds with them ever and have gone through the hard struggle to accomplish it.   I am just not sure that we, personally, want to engage that struggle.

Being in the in-between can be tough - sometimes it feels like you have both the positives and other times both the negatives of the more absolute poles of whatever spectrum you inhabit. For us, living in the ad hoc in-between of Elle's sleeping schedule and norms fits that dynamic to a T.  I love parts of co-sleeping, the cuddling, side-nursing, and the contentment Elle demonstrates so strongly.  I also love those nights when she sleeps  in one of her cribs blissfully.  The thing is, I want to have both of them - just in moderation.

But babies can struggle in the in-between, the limbo, the ad hoc.  It takes decades to understand that the world is really, truly grey and not black and white. Elle is still working out what the colors black and white are visually, so their use in a metaphor is going to be a bridge too far.  Maybe next week???

B.A.B.E. Week 36: Ski trip tips

Here we are in Utah -- where I am from and where Wilson loves to ski.  So we are making the best of both -- seeing family and hanging out at ski resorts.  

Wilson has now skied at Alta, Brighton, Solitude and Snowbird on this trip and Elle and I were with him for the first three.   For the first three (and tomorrow),  we head up to the resort as a family and set up a base camp in the lodge.   At the base camp, one of us watches Elle while the other one grabs some turns on the slopes.   And despite snowy boots and the loud cacophony of skiers enjoying their day, so far our system has worked pretty well.   So I've developed some "tips" if anyone else chooses to do the family ski day with a baby.

1. Plan to buy some sort of food items.  Usually the best places at ski lodges are also the places that serves as restaurants/cafeterias.  Thus, if you want to be warmly welcomed by the staff, plan to buy some food and leave on your table for the duration of the day.   That way, you are paying customer who just happens to have blankets spread on the floor by the table.
   
2. Bring multiple blankets.  You need a couple of blankets for your sweet one to roll around on, sleep on, play on, etc.  And then you need a blanket or two to throw on top if your sweet one does take a nap in the middle of the noise.   Also, blankets (rather than just ski coats/suits) are very handy because it is easy to take them on and off when the temperatures in ski lodges vary widely.
3. Bring toys and books (especially books).  While I am a big fan of letting your child explore and play with non-toy items (like oranges), it is nice to have some actual toys.  Especially if that toy is one your child uses to soothe with.   I also think that books have been particularly handy because it is a great time to be fully focused on your babe and read books to him/her.
4. Find a corner.    A corner helps to keep both your blankets and babe out of the way but also to afford a little extra quiet to the babe to sleep.
   
5. Try to fit all your stuff into minimal bags.   With skiing alone, you have a ton of stuff: boots, goggles, gloves, helmets, skis, etc.  With a baby, you usually have a lot of stuff as well.   Thus combined, it feels like a mountain that you have to schlep from place to place.  Thus, we found that if we put almost everything into a huge black bag and also brought a ski bag that fit both sets of skis and poles, then Wilson could carry all that stuff while I focused on Elle (keeping her warm and safe from the car to our final destination).

B.A.B.E. Week 35: Elle's likes, dislikes, and maybe her first word

Elle turned 8 months old today and we think that she expressed her first word today via sign language -- milk!  She "said" milk with her sign (think a hand milking an udder) after I had told her caregiver, Tanya, that I would nurse Elle in about 45 minutes.   Then I came downstairs to relieve Tanya a bit later and there they were with an empty bottle.  Tanya told me that Elle had been signing "milk" and sure enough when we showed Elle her empty bottle while signing "milk", she too signed "milk" at her bottle.  A half hour later, she sort of did the sign again for Wilson.  So voila!  Perhaps Elle has now communicated her first word.

It is good that Elle is now perhaps beginning to communicate because she sure is a social individual.

Likes a house full of people

Elle really enjoys having our house full of people, especially kids.  She likes being in a pack.  And she doesn't limit this enjoyment to super sweet girls like our 2 and 4 year old guests pictured above, she also enjoys being in a pack of senior citizens.  Just being around people is what she craves and she can get crabby if it is just the 2 of us home for a day.

Dislikes stroller rides

While Elle enjoys being outside, she prefers to be in our arms or in a baby carrier.  For some reason, she currently does not like her stroller.  She has never adored her stroller but is now starting to have an active distaste for the equipment.  This is a huge bummer for me because putting her in the jogging stroller was a way for me to get work out time pretty easily.  It is now not so easy when she starts to scream.

That said, we went for a run today and I bribed her with some teething crackers.  It actually worked pretty well -- because she never got upset and then fell asleep.  This was a relief as I feel like my fitness has plateaued and may even be deteriorating from when I ran the half-marathon in November. My regression is an unwelcome development and isn't really helping me with the body/fitness part of B.A.B.E.dom -- especially if Elle's stroller protests become a regular occurrence.

Likes junkanoo

This past week, we had the opportunity to go to one of the things that makes the Bahamas so special -- Junkanoo.  Junkanoo is this crazy street festival parade that starts in the dead of night on Christmas/Boxing day and New Years Day.   On New Years Day, it starts at 2 am and was still going strong when we got there at 9 am.   It is amazing because it is a panoply of incredible handmade costumes and floats, dancing, music, celebration, and everything is human powered so the floats you see below are being either carried or pushed by humans.   

It is also really loud with 400 person bands and huge barrel drums so Elle is wearing some sound-cancelling headphones below.   Even with her sound-cancelling headphones, Elle loved Junkanoo.  She smiled and kicked her legs and seems happily engaged as we admired the performers and their ability to perform/march throughout the night and into the hot Bahamas sun.