Dear ECS: Tour de “West” and wilderness backpacking

Dear ECS,

Wow honey, what a whirlwind we have been on these last 6 weeks.  From Addis to Berlin to DC to Corpus Christi to Charlottesville to Chicago to Montana to the overnight train to Portland to Seattle to Salt Lake and now on the plane to Maine.   The movement has been exhilarating (and a little exhausting for your mom and dad), seeing and being in so many amazing parts of our great country.  With so many loved ones, both family and friends who have known you or about to know you for your whole life; and have known your mom and/or dad for so many years. 

The movement has been a little challenging at times for you, with so many faces to play with along the way.  Saying goodbye is hard for a 4 year old, and for a 39 year old, and we have had to say goodbye to a lot of loved ones these last 6 weeks.  But that means we have also gotten to say hello to those same great people and to get to spend some treasured time with them.  The goodbyes are worth it, but it is hard for you in those moments and we try to be as empathic and understanding as possible for all the processing you are doing about family, relationships and movement.

During these last weeks, we have gotten to spend so much time together as whole family.  This works out really well, as Mu, you and me all love this time.  I am already projecting forward despite my better instincts to when we land in Cairo in a month and revert back to the normal rhythms of our family, with both your mom and dad working and you in school.  That is the rhythm that allows us to be the people we need to be for the foreseeable future, engaged in our lives, learning and working outside of our house.  But this treasured time in the US and the duality of both frenetic travel and lingering whole family time means that this is our new normal, 10 weeks is enough to reset our internal family biorhythms.   

There has been part of this US tour, mostly out West, that had us apart as a whole family.  Your mom was generous and enabled me to go on a serious backpacking adventure with Sean, my college buddy, and some other friends in the Teton Wilderness for a week.  This trip was deep in the wilderness, by some measures we went to the most remote point in the lower 48 at Bridger Lake not far from the Yellowstone River.  We crossed rivers swollen with snowmelt and a mountain pass still decidedly in the frozen tundra of winter.  We covered a ton of ground and were the first people in much of the terrain we crossed and privileged to be in some of the prettiest and wildest parts of our great country.   We saw a grizzly above our camp on our second to last night in the backcountry. 

Throughout the trip, I was constantly thinking and talking about you and Muriel, as 4 of the 5 guys on the trip are dads and husbands and much of our talks were about the shared joys and challenges of those two roles.  And I was also thinking about an imagined and hopeful future when we are able to do these kinds of adventures as whole family.   Given how challenging the trip was and how remote we were for most of it, that future is many years in the future.  But it is there and coming closer by the day.   One recurring thought I had as we were on the trip/adventure was how vital this part of my life is to my self-identity, being comfortable and thriving in the wilderness.   This is part of your dad (and mom) that you can’t know about yet, without the full context.  We have started you skiing, climbing and hiking, all of which you love.  But it is going to be quite awhile before we can fully share in this part of our life. 

One thing that was a powerful thread of the backpacking trip was the unspoiled nature and wildlife we saw, with so many different mammals and birds thriving in the deep wilderness.   The grand vistas, roaring rivers, calm lakes, and calm animals created a visual cornucopia, a constant for the entire seven days in the backcountry.  When 100% of your time is in such wonder, I find my mind calms and the peacefulness feels primal.  Which is a weird combo because peace and primal are not things that usually correlated.  This feeling, for me, only comes from being deep in nature, and there is a process in the first couple of days of settling into the calm.  With your/our future only projected to become more busy and noisy, I predict being able to retreat to nature for a respite and renewal will only become more important.   

A second clear thread from my trip was the camaraderie, friendship and teamwork that we enjoyed on the trip.  This bond and coming together into a sum greater than its constituent parts is one of my favorite parts of trips, and being on teams generally.   Everyone on my trip has spent plenty of time in the backcountry and knows the tools of the trade, so everyone could fill many roles on the trip.  This is what makes a team powerful.  Sean was the clear leader; it was his 40^th party, his vision and his bringing us together.  This is great, as teams need a leader.   You are still in the process of figuring out friendships, which is frankly going to be something you do for decades.  I am still working on this as a friend to loved ones, some whom I have known for many decades and some less than a year. 

\

With that honey, we have about another month in the US and London before we get to Cairo.  It is going to be a continued fun adventure, and one that will mostly in New England.  Let’s hope we keep up the great memories and adventures.

love,

dad